Marriage

Congratulations!!

This is one of the most exciting times of your life and we are honored to be a part of it!  It is our goal that your marriage is a fulfilling and lasting experience, and to help you find out more about yourself, about your fiancée and about God’s wonderful plan for you and your marriage.  It will be a time of information, discovery and challenge as we help you with the discernment and preparation process for your marriage.  We also extend our services after the wedding for any follow-up care that might be needed.  We would like to develop a relationship with you that goes beyond the wedding ceremony.

When you and your fiancée have finished reading the information in this packet carefully and have filled out the included forms, give us a call to set up an appointment and we will walk you through the process.  We are here to serve!

“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love.  But the greatest of these is love.”  

1 Corinthians 13:13 (NIV)

Core Beliefs

The Pastors and staff members at LVCC have agreed not to teach, model or express in anyway doctrine or behavior that is inconsistent or contrary to our Core Beliefs, which is available at our website by clicking here.

Roles and Responsibilities

Once we have received the marriage license from you, we will send it in to the County Recorder’s Office after the wedding. We can also help you with the logistics of your wedding by providing option for musicians, caterers, photographers, etc.  Your responsibilities are as follows:

• Obtaining marriage license from the County Recorder’s office.
• Completing 5 marriage enrichment counseling sessions (see below) prior to the wedding.
• Bringing the marriage license to the ceremony. The officiating Pastor will arrange the necessary signatures and mail back into the County Recorder’s office.
• Hiring of Wedding Coordinator, Photographer, Sound Tech/DJ.

Wedding Coordinators

We highly encourage you to recruit or hire a Wedding Coordinator, one who will work with the wedding party, family and DJ so that the songs, positioning and queues can be coordinated smoothly (ours will be included if you will be using our facilities). A good Coordinator will take the stress off of you, making your special day more enjoyable. Make sure your Wedding Coordinator contacts the officiating Pastor prior to rehearsal so they understand how the Pastor has arranged the ceremony, and what part of the rehearsal he will be conducting so there is no confusion.

Photographers and Videographers

Photographers and videographers are more than welcome to move about during the ceremony, making sure they capture your special day.  However, we would ask that they don’t disrupt the service or draw attention to themselves in an inappropriate way, such as getting too close to the center area, asking the Pastor to “jump” out of the way during the kiss or changing positions that were established at the rehearsal. If they have special blocking or positioning requests, please have them contact the officiating Pastor before rehearsals.

Sound Techs/DJs

We highly recommend that your Sound Tech/DJ attend the rehearsal so the song queues can be practiced and that they understand the flow of the ceremony (ours will be included if you will be using our facilities). If they feel the officiating Pastor needs to use a microphone, please have them provide a lapel microphone that the officiating Pastor can wear avoiding the use of a handheld microphone or a stand-mounted microphone, as it will impede the flow of the ceremony.

Pastor’s Fees

Our Pastors do not charge a fee for the counseling or for their officiating services they provide and leave it up to each couple to make a donation instead.  The usual donation can vary, depending on the resources of the couple, the size and scope of the wedding ceremony, and any other extenuating circumstances.  The average donations range between $100-$300.

Follow-up

We would love to offer our services to you after the wedding and often recommend that follow-up sessions are scheduled (free of charge).  If so, additional arrangements need to be made other than what is described in this packet.

Confidentiality

Absent an applicable legal or ethical exception, everything disclosed by a client to the Pastor is considered confidential, including the Pastor’s thoughts based on such information and is not to be disclosed by the Pastor to anyone else.  Accordingly, information between the Pastor and the client is held strictly confidential unless:

1. The client authorizes the release of information in writing and with a signature.
2. The Pastor is ordered by a court to release information.
3. Child abuse/neglect, dependent adult abuse, elder adult abuse, or spouse abuse are suspected.*
4. A client presents a physical danger to self or others.*

 *As mandated by California law, even if such abuses or dangers are even suspected.

Expectations

1)  Attend Counseling Sessions 

We require at least 5 counseling sessions prior to the wedding.  The purpose of these sessions is to help you and your fiancé address different issues that you will not doubt face in your marriage.  We will address such topics as:

• Personality Styles
• Love Languages
• Conflict management
• Finances
• Roles and Expectations

Our job as pastors is to prepare you for marriage by offering biblical counsel, encouragement and direction.  Our counsel will be based on education, experience and most of all on Biblical principles.  You don’t have to be well-versed in the Bible, a member of LVCC or even be a Christian to benefit from these sessions.

2)  Abstain From Sexual Intimacy  

Statistics show that those who abstain from sexual intimacy before the wedding not only have a higher chance of staying together but also describe a more fulfilling and satisfying marriage relationship.  The sacrifice a couple makes is well worth the benefits that abstinence brings.

“It is God’s will that you should be sanctified that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable.”  

I Thessalonians 4:3-4 (NIV)

Please also understand that God does not look at your past failures. Instead, He looks at us as broken people, whom He can make anew. With His forgiveness, we can start all over again.  As we ask God to forgive us through Jesus, He will see us as a completely new couple.

Before proceeding with registration, please read the article 4 REASONS NOT TO MOVE IN WITH YOUR PARTNER.